I would love to find a resource that publishes a list of competitions, prizes & literary magazines that accepts simultaneous submissions AND works previously published. It's tough to comb through everything out there. ONLY Poems is one place and I'm hunting for more. Anybody can help? Ta!
GENERAL QUESTION: How much deep writing analysis of masters should I be doing regularly? (I specify masters to separate it from my critique group work). When I was an (winning) online poker player, a performance coach pointed out that I was no longer doing enough analysis of my hand history and that that was eroding my confidence. I've read Reading Like Writer and belonged to George Saunders' Substack but I'm curious how much / how often writers (besides George, who seems to do it all the time) continue to take stories or portions of stories and tear them apart to keep their chops up and to continue learning?
Great question! Since I teach, I analyze and extract craft techniques all the time, and I don't confine myself to contemporary or American based literature. But even if I didn't teach, I'd do this because I find the process amazingly inspiring and it sends me to the page. When I come across a structure, for instance, that I have never tried, I want to try it. When I see a sentence that feels alive and fresh, I want to understand what makes it so. And then try it. For me, it's critical to the longevity of a writer; but then again, I have a restless mind.
I am scouting a publisher for my next book. What publishers give the best marketing etc. for poetry authors. I write of nature, love, loss, family, wildlife etc. My manuscript has been edited by a well published author. Thank You.
See if you find any that feel like they'd fit your vibe and then have a look on their social media to check out how vocal they are in terms of marketing and promo. You could also try contacting other authors on their list to ask how they found the process.
And hopefully someone else here will pitch in with some specific suggestions!
NINA: I noticed somewhere that you're a law school grad. I'm wondering how law school and/or legal practice influenced your writing. I had published some personal essays before I attended law school. I TA'd for legal writing, and was an editor of law review while in school. After practicing as a litigator for a few years, I left law for 15 years to raise my kids. During that time I wrote personal essays and nonfiction articles. I felt that my legal education had trained me to be more concise and was an overall benefit to my writing style. How about you? I love your Substack and try to compose sentences each week in the styles you present.
A great question! I'm mostly in the realm of fiction, short stories and novels, and I find writing takes all of me: the logical and the imaginative. Law school refined, as you know, logic. It helps to have a logical bent to find gaps in the plot or to ask myself: where's the evidence for this? You just wrote "Jake is a lazy son of bitch." Where's the damn evidence? Having studied for the bar, as you know, you've trained your mind to hold a massive amount of material. So holding a massive story, i.e., a novel is not so daunting. What it doesn't give you--and you note it here with the word "concise"--is expansiveness. Legal briefs and legal writing ban the adjectives and adverbs. They don't want a style that's swirling and loose, highly adjectival or dependent clause-heavy. So, I've had to teach myself this syntax to capture the sound of a character who is not concise and streamlined; who perhaps has more doubt or is reflective and pondering. I will say that I think some of my legal training has helped me analyze sentences. In some ways, it's akin to the elements of the laws; ie, how to establish copyright infringement and the four-pronged test. With sentences, you have to add the rhetorical--what meaning is created by this design?
ERIN: I've been writing short stories seriously for eleven or so years, and I feel like I'm producing the same kind of short stories over and over, in terms of narrative arc/structure (basically, I have the journey-towards-an-epiphany-with-a-short-meaningful-denouement thing down, but it's now feeling habitual and not always particularly subtle). Do you have any suggestions to shake up my creative process, with a view to writing pieces that feel fresh again?
I know you didn't ask me the question, but I thought I'd chime in because I teach an alternative plot class. One way to begin expanding beyond the habitual causation plot is to collect stories that defy that design. Analyze them; what is the propulsive energy? what are they doing instead of causation? Then try the architecture for a story of your own.
Kudos to you for recognizing this in your writing and wanting to grow (although I’m sure your stories are already fabulous!!). Similar things about my own writing were pointed out to me by my critique group during our early meetings - so you’re not the only one :)
First, you’ll have a list of books, music, tv, art, etc to come back to when needing inspiration and a brain refresh, so that’s always a good thing!
Secondly, as you do so, you can keep a special asterisk in your mind for stories that do surprising things: maybe they have a structure that’s uncommon, maybe they have characters that are more alive and less cut-from-stock, maybe they use their settings in interesting ways. What catches your eye? And then, how can you use their tricks in your own unique ways? You’re not copying, you’re getting inspiration.
Do this too, as you read or watch movies or tv in future.
I hope this helps, and remember - there’s nothing wrong with the way you write now and you are already ahead of the curve for wanting to grow.
Thanks so much Erin, I appreciate you pointing a way forward! And also, thanks for the encouragement about my stories -- I have been feeling a bit down and uncertain about them, so I appreciate it. :)
I am an involved in Nina‘s stunning sentences workshops. Such beautiful writing is new to me and doesn’t come naturally. For the last two years, I’ve been frozen and stuck in writing and rewriting my first chapter, over and over again. Recently, I adopted Steinbeck‘s rules and I’m just pushing through the writing and I am up to 70 pages. I cannot write beautiful sentences like Nina has been teaching us when I am pushing to get words on the page. When would such artistic sentences usually be written? In the first draft? In the second draft? Thank you for your consideration.
Thank you for joining my stunning sentence world! There is no one way to write a novel; there's probably 80,000 ways. It sounds like what you're doing right now is best: write and write without paying attention to the sentences to create a first draft. After this, the story will float around in your inner world and become more solid. Characters will begin (and maybe they already have begun) to feel real and alive and talking to you. There! That's a beginning to go back and work on sentences, especially if you're in first person or close third. You need the character's diction and syntactical choices--but before you can do that, you have to hear the character speaking.
JO: Hello again, I’m Lea. Well, this is not really a question in itself. I just created a writing system since last year that I just have the names just the beginning of this year. The name is called the Writing Essence system (I don’t know if you ever heard of it before). So the system goes like this:
The Writing Essences
For Primary Essences:
- Theatrical
- Humorous
- Natural
- Classic
- Sentimental
- Romantic
- Ethereal
For Secondary Essences:
- Theatrical
- Humorous
- Natural
- Classic
- Sentimental
- Romantic
- Ethereal
For Tertiary Essences:
- Theatrical
- Humorous
- Natural
- Classic
- Sentimental
- Romantic
- Ethereal
For Undertones:
- Sharp
- Stable
- Soft
Format:
“[Author’s Name]’s Writing Essence is [Primary Essence]-[Secondary Essence]-[Tertiary Essence] with [Undertone] undertones.”
For example, my Writing Essence is Classic-Romantic-Sentimental with Stable undertones.
Disclaimer: Most writers will include all elements from the essences, but their Writing Essence is their three most prominent of the Essences and their most dominant Undertone out of all.
The Writing Essence system also focuses on how each Essence and the corresponding Undertone affect the mechanics below and also the other way around:
Theme
Characterization
Worldbuilding
Plot
Vocabulary
Syntax
Voice
However, Conventions (spelling, punctuation, and grammar) is the only aspect where it is mostly Essence and Undertone neutral. That said though, certain stylistic choices in Conventions can affect the Essence and Undertone.
For this system to work at its best, the writer has to write first and write a lot. Then the writer (or whoever else analysed their works (e.g., readers, beta readers, critics, editors, etc.) must sit back and look for the underlying patterns throughout one (if that is the only work) or several of their works (ideally across many works and genres). Once their Writing Essence has been identified, the writer can do the following:
Lean further into and refine their instincts (their natural Writing Essence).
Make subtle changes to their Writing Essence (mostly to their tertiary Essences and Undertones)
Challenge themselves by drastically changing your Writing Essence (either temporarily or long-term), However, they too need to be very intentional about the change.
For a writer’s writing to be strong and sound, their instinct (i. e., their Writing Essence), their intention (what they have in mind), and execution (i. e., the actual written work and the mechanics behind it) have to be in alignment. And that’s what distinguishes strong writing from weak writing.
That said, all Essences and Undertones can write in all genres and tropes. The difference lies in how one’s Writing Essence will affect the intention and execution. For example, typical romance comedies in popular market usually radiate Romantic, Humorous, Natural, or maybe Sentimental during its more introspective scenes. However, a writer with Ethereal (whether as a primary/secondary/tertiary) in their Writing Essence can write a romance comedy that is more dreamy, introspective, fantastical, and/or all the above. Meanwhile, a writer with Theatrical in their Writing Essence can write a romance comedy that is more punchy, dramatic, and play-like. As for Classic? Just think of Jane Austen, but can also be the modern version of her works.
By the way, this system does not only include the canon and literary authors, but can also include commercial authors, fanfiction writers, poets, screenwriters, playwrights, songwriters, mangakas, visual novel authors, webnovel authors, illustrators who are also authors, children book authors, creative nonfiction writers, journalists, essayists, memoirists, bloggers, critics, some academia writers, and anyone who writes creatively and expressively.
However, the system does not include technical writers (e.g., standard manual writers, etc.), functional writers (e.g., medical reports, police records, etc.), ghostwriters, AI-assisted writing, and artists who does not write for their creative pieces.
Colors Behind the Essences
Theatrical: Crimson Red
Humorous: Cadmium Yellow
Natural: Forest Green
Classic: Royal Blue
Romantic: Rose Pink
Sentimental: Apricot Orange
Ethereal: Periwinkle Purple
Undertones and Color Value
Sharp: Darkens the base color with black.
Stable: Keeps the base color as is.
Soft: Lightens the base color with white.
———
So what do you think of this system? If you have questions about it, I can further clarify them, and I may also would send a Google Doc more about the Writing Essence system.
Hi Lea! Wow, this is really interesting (and a super comprehensive breakdown). I love how you've associated colours with all the different essences for a visual element.
This bit is my favourite:
"For this system to work at its best, the writer has to write first and write a lot."
And then to analyse the patterns and decide whether to lean into, change or challenge their instincts. Sounds like a really thoughtful practice for any writer.
Thank you, I’m glad that you like it. So, if you would look to yourself, how would you describe your own Writing Essence? The three most dominant in your own writing plus the undertone?
I mean it’s true, but what is the three Essences that you tend to go for, regardless of genre? For example, I would consider myself as a Classic-Romantic-Sentimental with Stable undertones despite having written poems, a horror fanfiction, a crack fic, and now a romantic dramedy.
The thing is that what kinds of themes, characters, worldbuilding, plots, vocabulary, syntaxes, and voices do you tend to gravitate to in spite of “massive changes between projects”. For example, with Theme, here is my explanation:
Themes (per Essence)
Theatrical: Good versus Evil, Justice, Revenge, Identity, Free Will, Grief, Human Perception, Mortality, Courage, Power, War,
Humorous: Coming-of-Age, Love (not only romantic), Family, Identity, Free Will, Friendship, Human Perception, Childhood, Courage, War,
Natural: Coming-of-Age, Revenge, Survival, Family, Perseverance, Free Will, Friendship, Mortality, Childhood, Peace, War, Innocence, Loneliness, etc.
Classic: Coming-of-Age, Love (not only romantic), Good versus Evil, Justice, Revenge, Survival, Faith, Family, Identity, Kindness, Perseverance, Free Will, Friendship, Grief, Human Perception, Mortality, Childhood, Courage, Peace, Power, Redemption, War, Innocence, Loneliness, etc.
Romantic: Coming-of-Age, Love (not only romantic), Faith, Family, Identity, Kindness, Perseverance, Free Will, Friendship, Grief, Human Perception, Childhood, Courage, Peace, Power, Redemption, War, Innocence, Loneliness, etc.
Sentimental: Coming-of-Age, Love (not only romantic), Faith, Family, Identity, Kindness, Perseverance, Friendship, Grief, Human Perception, Childhood, Peace, Redemption, Innocence, Loneliness, etc.
Ethereal: Good versus Evil, Faith, Free Will, Grief, Mortality, Peace, Redemption, Loneliness, etc.
Themes (per Undertone)
Sharp: Love (not only romantic), Good versus Evil, Justice, Revenge, Survival, Perseverance, Free Will, Grief, Human Perception, Mortality, Courage, Power, War,
Stable: Coming-of-Age, Love (not only romantic), Good versus Evil, Justice, Survival, Faith, Family, Identity, Kindness, Perseverance, Free Will, Friendship, Grief, Human Perception, Mortality, Childhood, Courage, Peace, Power, Redemption, War, Innocence, Loneliness, etc.
Soft: Coming-of-Age, Love (not only romantic), Faith, Family, Identity, Kindness, Perseverance, Friendship, Grief, Human Perception, Childhood, Peace, Redemption, Innocence, Loneliness, etc.
It’s alright, you can take your time. 😊 It can be overwhelming, especially from the writer themselves like you and me (I did not even know mine until reflecting a lot from writing events and have the language for the system). It’s often after you reflect from yourself and also what others said of your works that you can identify it.
I am at the uni of Iowa and I'm studying and making comic/essay hybrids. I say hybrids only because sometimes I want it to just be writing other times I use lots of visuals. That said, I often draft my work as traditional screenplays and I had a few questions for you based on that.
1. What are some films that have great/interesting/poetic/unique narration that you recommend studying? Comics are full of them, so if you think of something experimental that would also be great to just see.
2. How do you go about the interplay between action lines and dialogue? And how do you revise and sharpen them after you got your draft all locked in?
3. I have started writing my action lines in a poetic register or style, I was curious if you had anyone that you can think of that writes action lines like this, or just anyone you really love that we should check out for great action lines?
Hi Nikka! Thanks so much for your question! First of all, what you're writing sounds f-ing RAD! ...
I'll go in order:
1). Hmm, I think these are my favorite examples of unique/playful narration (and all skew comedy if aren't outright comedy): "Adaptation," "Clueless," "Fleishman's in Trouble," "Arrested Development," "The Princess Bride," "Ferris Bueller's Day Off," "The Big Short." Each of these is doing something unique with authorship (i.e., who is the "god" of this world?) and VOICE. So that the narration ("V.O."/voice-over in script terms) brings its own fun energy (vs: just a rote "and then this happened next" play by play). In "The Princess Bride," for example, the fairy tale we're watching unfold is "narrated" by a grandfather reading a bedtime story to his grandson—the grandfather is thus the weaver of the entire world, and the dynamic between the characters and the narration is its own start-&-stop, self-referential gag throughout the whole film. I'm not a huge fan of the show, but "Sex and the City" for sure conjured some iconic voice-over! In "Adaptation," Charlie Kaufman is to some degree always playing with whether he's writing a "good" or "bad" screenplay, and in fact has a scene where screenwriting guru Robert McKee yells: "And God help you if you use voice-over in your work, my friends. God help you! That’s flaccid, sloppy writing. Any idiot can write a voice-over narration to explain the thoughts of a character" ... in a film where Kaufman IS using voice-over! So there's a lot of PLAY in these examples.
And on that point (per McKee), I should say that the "common wisdom" in screenwriting is that V.O. is a liability and should be avoided whenever possible. BUT, although bad V.O. is an absolute dream-killer, as you see above it CAN be done very, very well. You just want to use it sparingly and make sure it's ADDING to the story, never pulling people out. Let me know if you have more Qs about that "rule"!
2). Action lines & dialogue: The general rule is you want your action lines to be *super duper tight* & economical—only what absolutely needs to be described & set-up for reader in order for the characters to take over the scene and run with it. Ideally, only one paragraph or a few lines to get us into the dialogue. Once you've established that we're in a spaceship and, say, panicked because an alarm is going off, you get OUT of that set-up and let the characters take over with dialogue & action. But let me know if I misunderstood your Q!
3). So, "industry standard" is that action lines should be written VERY straightforwardly for clarity & pith ("lean & mean"). Some screenwriters are slightly more colorful with their lines, but it can be never be verbose. You would have a very hard time getting a script made that didn't adhere to industry standard guidelines. The reason is actually a good one: Scripts are first & foremost a BLUEPRINT. They're instructions with which the director, crew, and actors build sets and light correctly and act correctly and execute your writerly vision. Action lines are meant to simply be an "information conveyance" system. You also don't want to spend too much time in them because it SLOWS DOWN the "action" (your plot) for your reader—your reader isn't getting the free flowing story experience they would when WATCHING. And you want the reading to replicate the WATCHING of the eventual filmed story as much as possible. That's how you get someone to fall in love with & make your script—you give them the VISUAL experience on the page that they'd get seeing it on the screen.
That said, the way I teach in my classes is that it is absolutely OKAY to bring some voice to your action lines. Especially if it's tone/mood/rhythm setting. And you'll see a lot of great writers do this here & there: Greta Gerwig, P.T. Anderson, Kenneth Lonergan (though he comes from playwriting), Kaufman. So you shouldn't be afraid to bring your own "voice," and flair to your action lines. But it can never be DISTRACTING. You never want to be sacrificing clarity & speed for your voice. So you really can't do it in meter. Remember the action lines are an information delivery system, not their own "thing." This was VERY HARD for me when I began writing scripts, because I came to it as a poet! So I get the urge to make the action lines into something more. It's simply not what a script is, though.
BUT! I would definitely encourage you to find ways to *fold that meter* into the story itself! Remember, the action lines in a script don't wind up on screen. No words wind up on screen. So no one will hear or see this beauty you're conjuring. And only what can be SEEN OR HEARD when filmed ever makes it to the audience. Your metered writing sounds so fun & creative—you need to get that into the meat of the scene! So we the audience can experience it.
Let me know if I can clarify anything or if you have any other questions! <3
Wow so cool. These answers are all wonderful. I will dig into the folks I've not heard or thought of. I do love Kaufman and hadn't made that connection of the VO in Adaptation so that's brilliant. I also took McKee's seminar and he was marvelous and basically exactly like he was in the movie lol.
I totally hear what you're saying on the action lines and VO, in comics, which again is where I'm sort of working and borrowing from film since it's just way more developed now, you almost can't get away without using VO/Narration. Some comics are wordless but because you can't have someone act or play a musical score you almost have to add another vehicle for meaning, which becomes the VO. I just feel like if a film or show can pull it off, then it really must be incredible. Anyways your answers around that were all perfect. If anything else comes up from this response, I'd love to hear it.
As far as action lines that makes total sense. For me I'm also the one drawing it and I guess when I think of great art versus great illustration, the difference for me usually means that the artists discovered something in the making of the finished object that they couldn't have worked out in small scale, had people sign off on and then just transcribed to a large scale (which is often the process for illustration). I'm being super broad here so I'm sure there are exceptions, but it seems impossible to imagine Jackson Pollock making a small scale drawing of his painting and then making the room sized painting while following the blueprint he'd laid out. But that is exactly what Normal Rockwell would usually do (as I understand it). So for me I guess I've gravitated towards writing poetic action lines as a way to allow me to come back to the scene and not fully know what's there and kinda find it on the page, which is exciting. That said, I did find the screenplay for Slumdog Millionaire to be kinda poetic in how minimal it was. I'll throw up a little bit below to maybe better explain my thinking and what I'm looking to find more of but if any of this sparks any suggestions or further ideas, I'd be so grateful to hear it but no expectation. Your insights above were great and already so helpful.
INT. JAVED'S SAFE-HOUSE. BATHROOM. NIGHT.
An expensive bathroom suite . Excess of marble and gold taps. Into the bath, a hand is scattering rupee notes. Hundreds and hundreds of notes, worth hundreds of thousands of rupees. The sound of a fist thumping on the bathroom door, furious shouting from the other side.
JAVED O/S
Salim! Salim!
INT. STUDIO. BACKSTAGE. DAY.
Darkness. Then, glimpses of faces. In the half-light, shadowy figures move with purpose. An implacable voice announces.
Hi Nikka! I'm so glad some of these thoughts were helpful!!
"Slumdog Millionaire" is a great example of how to be both very pithy & economical AND exciting and artful in that minimalism. I do not (to be clear) think everyone's action lines should sound identical—far from it. What you want is to find YOUR version of sparse, packed-with-visual-meaning, clean & clear—in YOUR voice. But, yeah, meter would not only be unbearably distracting for the reader (no matter how brilliant or beautiful) it would distort the clear information you're trying to convey.
I don't think you should hesitate at all to use V.O.! You sound creative & original through-&-through, so I'm sure you can find an original twist (like some of these other films we've referenced) for your V.O., that really sells it! I would maybe consider doing THAT in meter?? Instead? Could be really cool.
Not sure I answered all your follow-up questions, please let me know if I didn't!
Hello! I'm an aspect writer with my own blog, and I was wondering how you would suggest trying to reach a wider audience of people. As of now it is just my close friends and family that read it and I'd like to market it out further. It's through wordpress. Thanks!
Your blog (and yourself) have a warm and optimistic vibe. The world is pretty intense right now so I would lean into feel good content as it could give people a sense of comfort and provide a temporary escape.
My advice:
Find a social media platform that you don't hate and focus on creating content that gives tons of value to folks. If you like making video content, I would focus on tik tok and cross post to instagram.
If you prefer written content, I would focus on bluesky and cross post to threads & X.
Whichever platform you decide, I would start with sharing the following types of content:
- Quotes | Inspirational, relateable or funny
- Advice | Actionable, specific, quick and unique
You mentioned friends and family reading your blog, I would ask them to share the highly valuable social media content you create. Its super easy and fast to retweet/share to stories etc and it will get you in front of fresh eyes.
Another thing that you can do is write things about your town and share them in local facebook groups.
Things like short stories about places people know about, roundups of things to do close by, and do it in the same feel good style as your blog. On your personal facebook page, pin a post directing people to your blog.
Folks will click on your profile out of curiosity when they see your posts in the groups and head to your blog to see more stuff beacuase naturally humans are nosey (;
SHELBY, I'm self-publishing my first collection of poetry. Should I be writing my own synopsis [for the back of the book] to describe the collection? Should I hire someone who has a more objective lens? (If so, how?) Any tips appreciated.
Hello Allison, and congratulations on your collection!
There isn't a "right" answer for this, and it depends on many factors but I can tell you that the synopsis and the cover of your book are the two of the biggest components of getting someone to opt in to reading your work and are extremely important.
If you do decide to hire someone, I would choose a copywriter with marketing expertise particularly in the area/themes that your collection covers. Reedsy can be a great resource for finding someone, and so can word of mouth.
Reguardless of your choice, I highly reccomend perusing shelves at a local bookstore/library and pulling collections with synopsis(es?) Synopsi? 👀 that grab your attention and using these as inspiration. If choosing to write yourself, pinpoint what it is that grabbed you and if going with a pro, present them as inspiration so they understand your vision.
Writing a synopsis! I am having to do this for the first time... and I am having trouble keeping it short whilst including all key plot points, main characters, lead up to climax, climax itself and the resolution. Plus I am suppoed to howcase my writing style in it! How important is length? what really matters most in a synopsis? Thanks
Ayyyy synopses. I feel your pain. And will try to answer your questions!
- How important is length? Well, depends what you're using it for. Most agents/submission guides will tell you what they want, eg: 1 page, 500 words, 3 pages, whatever. But as a general rule I think it's good practice to learn how to summarise your story in a single page (arg, I know).
- How to keep it short while including all the key plot points etc? Unfortunately you're never gonna manage to include everything you want to, especially if you have complicated subplots and an ensemble cast. My go-to approach is to focus on your protagonist's arc. All the vital stuff is happening to them, and it's their personal journey that's ultimately the most engaging. Think about cause/effect here, too. Something happens and your character responds/acts. You can ping pong your way through the whole synop that way. This also helps me keep on track and refrain from including extraneous details, because ALL the focus is on the main character and their journey through the story.
- How to showcase your writing style? I actually think this ties into the last point — when you're focusing on your character, you can add in a sense of *their* voice and POV by showing how they're emotionally/physically reacting as the story unfolds. But a synopsis isn't really the main place to be demonstrating your narrative voice anyway — keep that to your sample pages and hint at it more overtly in your query. Your synopsis is ostensibly a map for a reader/agent to make sure your story hits all the right narrative landmarks, so clarity is more important than anything.
SHELBY: Knowing that having an active & engaged social media presence (as a poet/spoken word performer who performs regularly, is quering their first book pub., and is looking to launch a merch. line), but also knowing that doing so properly takes up a lot of time & expertise, both of which I'm lacking, how would you suggest I best proceed?
(Notes: I have a friend who's an avid IG & TikTok user & who's offered to help me. I use fb & IG, but I'm usure of going to three (TikTok). Should I limit it, and to which ones?)
GENERAL QUESTION: my character is in his neighborhood, a bustling one. He knows everyone’s name, every shop, but none of these people is a character in the story. It’s near the beginning of the story and I don’t want to throw out 3-5 more names to readers that aren’t relevant to the story, but I also don’t want to give a generic description of a busy street as if he’s there for the first time. How do you handle this? How do you balance specificity without overwhelming readers?
If this is a first draft, I would let yourself go wild and describe it all, because I think you will find the perfect specific descriptions within when you go back to rewrite or revise. I would love for someone else to step in and give their perspective too, but something that came up for me was, what about describing things that a) would grab your character’s senses, and b)speak to the authority of your character.
So if I have a character who is a musician, she is going to use a lot of descriptors that relate to music. Instead of nails on a chalkboard, maybe something sounds like a record scratch, or an untuned instrument, or pitchy. (Just an on the fly example!) If I have a character who is interested in technology, she may be constantly relating to the technology around her, thinking about possible advancements or the problems it solves or prevents.
So think about your character’s relevant passions/career/things that make him, him. How does he relate to the world based off of that?
For the senses, instead of Joe’s Bakery, you can say, “I walked past the bakery every morning and although I rarely stepped inside, the smell of their croissants followed me the rest of the day. I was convinced the smell wafting through the street stuck itself to my shirt, and everyone around me could smell it, too. Next to the bakery, the door to the music store was constantly open, and the owner blared Billy Joel through the speakers. I didn’t love having Piano Man stuck in my head all day.”
That was terrible LOL but hopefully you see what I mean!
When you edit, you can take out the information that seems superfluous, or as you go on with the story you may decide to change the beginning anyway!
Oh, those are very good suggestions. Thank you, Erin. My character is a homeless street performer. He sings and dances and plays instruments. Besides music (sounds), what else do you think he would pay attention to?
I have another problem: the scene mentioned above is he’s walking down the street with the antagonist. He’s in quite a lot of trouble. So his mind is relatively occupied, so I don’t know how to describe this bustling scene because it’s probably just background noise to him at this point. How would you deal with it?
This sounds like a really interesting story!! This sends my mind off into a few different directions. Firstly, has your character always been homeless, or do they have a past you can draw upon for what he will notice? Perhaps he would compare how people treat him now to how people treated him in the past. He would be hyperaware of anyone who treats him especially kindly now. Perhaps there is someone in the neighborhood you're describing who gives him a free coffee or breakfast every day, but today he isn't able to stop and talk to them and accept the coffee because he is with the Villain of the novel. Does he look around trying to find someone who will help him, while the antagonist is talking to him (if he knows this person is the antagonist at the moment), and if you choose to use some of my previous advice you could always twist the tense, "Normally I noticed [something], but Theo's incessant talking was drowning it all out." "I didn't realize how much I loved the sounds of my town, the birds calling out to each other, the music pouring out of the flower shop, even the horns of the cars of impatient businessmen, until they were drowned out by Rufus' off-pitch drawl, like whoever tuned his voice did it wrong."
ERIN: How would you suggest I best follow and speak on (i.e., explain) my creative process as an IndigiQueer poet, writing about my intersectionalities, fed by the spirits of my ancestors (whose voices were suppressed, hidden, & lost), in a world that may not fully understand (or, in some cases, even respect/accept) any or all of these aspects/dynamics?
Hi Roméo, I love this question so much and thank you for trusting me with it. Based off of my own experience as a queer writer,
Decide where you have hard boundaries around your own process (like, you are writing a poem for yourself, or for a writing group, or for publication) and where you might be flexible (an example is paid work where you are working closely with an editor if you choose to be flexible without compromising your entire self)
Decide what you are willing to “teach” others, and where you are willing to simply state, “I appreciate your input, but I am making a choice to keep this piece the way it is as it reflects my intention…” and so forth. IF this book speaks to you, I might recommend glancing through Craft in the Real World by Matthew Salesses or some of Alexander Chee’s work, and recommending what you find most helpful to those who have questions. For example, Salesses speaks to how the structure of writing in the (Straight) White Western World is very different from how story structure is in other cultures and groups.
Stay true to your writing process no matter how hard others are working to get you to follow theirs - sometimes the hardest part of having boundaries is actually holding them and not crumbling.
I have a take what you need and leave the rest philosophy - allow your writing process to evolve as you yourself learn more information!
Find people you jive with to read your writing. We absolutely need to get used to criticism from individuals who do not see our work the same way as we do, or do not agree with it in some way. However, it’s important that you’re not constantly fighting for your work. Your work is meant to be loved.
To give an example, I write from a queer female perspective. I had a historical novel I was working on in which most of the characters were queer. I had a well-meaning person in my critique group argue with me about it, because he felt they weren’t getting enough push back for being queer in the context of the novel. But he wasn’t understanding that was the point, the problems most of the characters faced were outside of their queerness, and I was writing with the intention of queer joy. But does that mean none of his criticism was correct? Not necessarily. Perhaps there were ways I could have made my intention more clear within the work. So at the end of the day it involves us also putting a lot of ego aside, and turning over the criticism in our minds to find what was useful even if in the moment it didn’t feel like it was.
I sincerely hope this was all helpful and please feel free to ask me clarifying questions! Have a wonderful day, Roméo!
JO: Is there an ideal blend/balance of anecdote and narrative text, or does it depend entirely on the individual project? I'm at work on a 1,200-word essay with a LOT of anecdotes (mostly about household animals and death). There's just enough connective tissue to connect the anecdotes thematically, but something in me worries that readers will react with, "Oh, hell, ANOTHER story? About a totally different animal?" (If this question is too specific to my one project, feel free to toss it.)
Hi John! I think the connective tissue and the overall thematic arc/narrative journey of the piece is more important than hitting any arbitrary balance between the two. When you say "just enough connective tissue" that makes me think that perhaps it could be stronger? Do you know what you're trying to say with this essay? Does it have a clear opening premise/question? Does it have a shape? Does it build to some sort of resolution or exploration of that initial premise/question? Can the reader clearly see how you're jumping from anecdote to anecdote and layering up your ideas/meanings along the way? If not, there's a risk it ends up as just a collection of cool stories strung together... Although it sounds like your idea goes a lot deeper than that!
My suggestion would be to get the first draft out, then look more closely at the connectivity and shape of the whole thing. Then get some fresh eyes to give you objective feedback.
Hi, Jo...I would have responded sooner, but damn, your questions (and the heartbeat workshop) drove me right back into the essay, and I've been preoccupied since then. Right now I think a couple of sentences might be all that's needed. However it turns out, though, your input was invaluable. Thank you!
I would love to find a resource that publishes a list of competitions, prizes & literary magazines that accepts simultaneous submissions AND works previously published. It's tough to comb through everything out there. ONLY Poems is one place and I'm hunting for more. Anybody can help? Ta!
Chill Subs filters can do this: https://www.chillsubs.com/browse/magazines?page=1&sortBy=az&magazineSearch=&keywordSearch=&open=false&noFee=false&payment=false&bookmarked=false&hidden=false¤tTheme=false&wordCount=&responseTime=&minAcceptanceRate=0&maxAcceptanceRate=100&simSubs=false&previouslyPublished=false&nominates=false&activeOnSocials=false&print=false&freeExamples=false&expeditedResponse=false&masthead=false&minYear=&maxYear=&contributorCopies=false&simultaneousSubmissions=true&acceptPreviouslyPublished=true
(Link only works if you’re logged in.)
GENERAL QUESTION: How much deep writing analysis of masters should I be doing regularly? (I specify masters to separate it from my critique group work). When I was an (winning) online poker player, a performance coach pointed out that I was no longer doing enough analysis of my hand history and that that was eroding my confidence. I've read Reading Like Writer and belonged to George Saunders' Substack but I'm curious how much / how often writers (besides George, who seems to do it all the time) continue to take stories or portions of stories and tear them apart to keep their chops up and to continue learning?
Glenn,
Great question! Since I teach, I analyze and extract craft techniques all the time, and I don't confine myself to contemporary or American based literature. But even if I didn't teach, I'd do this because I find the process amazingly inspiring and it sends me to the page. When I come across a structure, for instance, that I have never tried, I want to try it. When I see a sentence that feels alive and fresh, I want to understand what makes it so. And then try it. For me, it's critical to the longevity of a writer; but then again, I have a restless mind.
Nina
I am scouting a publisher for my next book. What publishers give the best marketing etc. for poetry authors. I write of nature, love, loss, family, wildlife etc. My manuscript has been edited by a well published author. Thank You.
Hi Audrey, congrats on finishing your manuscript and hope you find a suitable publisher!
I don't have any personal recommendations but this is a good place to start for browsing indie presses: https://www.chillsubs.com/browse/presses
See if you find any that feel like they'd fit your vibe and then have a look on their social media to check out how vocal they are in terms of marketing and promo. You could also try contacting other authors on their list to ask how they found the process.
And hopefully someone else here will pitch in with some specific suggestions!
NINA: I noticed somewhere that you're a law school grad. I'm wondering how law school and/or legal practice influenced your writing. I had published some personal essays before I attended law school. I TA'd for legal writing, and was an editor of law review while in school. After practicing as a litigator for a few years, I left law for 15 years to raise my kids. During that time I wrote personal essays and nonfiction articles. I felt that my legal education had trained me to be more concise and was an overall benefit to my writing style. How about you? I love your Substack and try to compose sentences each week in the styles you present.
Sharon,
A great question! I'm mostly in the realm of fiction, short stories and novels, and I find writing takes all of me: the logical and the imaginative. Law school refined, as you know, logic. It helps to have a logical bent to find gaps in the plot or to ask myself: where's the evidence for this? You just wrote "Jake is a lazy son of bitch." Where's the damn evidence? Having studied for the bar, as you know, you've trained your mind to hold a massive amount of material. So holding a massive story, i.e., a novel is not so daunting. What it doesn't give you--and you note it here with the word "concise"--is expansiveness. Legal briefs and legal writing ban the adjectives and adverbs. They don't want a style that's swirling and loose, highly adjectival or dependent clause-heavy. So, I've had to teach myself this syntax to capture the sound of a character who is not concise and streamlined; who perhaps has more doubt or is reflective and pondering. I will say that I think some of my legal training has helped me analyze sentences. In some ways, it's akin to the elements of the laws; ie, how to establish copyright infringement and the four-pronged test. With sentences, you have to add the rhetorical--what meaning is created by this design?
Nina
ERIN: I've been writing short stories seriously for eleven or so years, and I feel like I'm producing the same kind of short stories over and over, in terms of narrative arc/structure (basically, I have the journey-towards-an-epiphany-with-a-short-meaningful-denouement thing down, but it's now feeling habitual and not always particularly subtle). Do you have any suggestions to shake up my creative process, with a view to writing pieces that feel fresh again?
Feby,
I know you didn't ask me the question, but I thought I'd chime in because I teach an alternative plot class. One way to begin expanding beyond the habitual causation plot is to collect stories that defy that design. Analyze them; what is the propulsive energy? what are they doing instead of causation? Then try the architecture for a story of your own.
Nina
Thank you Nina! Appreciate you chipping in here. I'll have a think and start collecting!
Hi Feby!!
Kudos to you for recognizing this in your writing and wanting to grow (although I’m sure your stories are already fabulous!!). Similar things about my own writing were pointed out to me by my critique group during our early meetings - so you’re not the only one :)
In the second lesson of the March Forever Workshop, (https://www.theforeverworkshop.com/p/your-writing-routine-is-broken-because) I talk about creating a toolkit. Jo has a fantastic post on this as well that goes beautifully with mine: (https://www.theforeverworkshop.com/p/community-skill-share-lets-make-a). If you can take some time maybe on the weekend or one evening if you have some free time, I think reading through these will be beneficial.
First, you’ll have a list of books, music, tv, art, etc to come back to when needing inspiration and a brain refresh, so that’s always a good thing!
Secondly, as you do so, you can keep a special asterisk in your mind for stories that do surprising things: maybe they have a structure that’s uncommon, maybe they have characters that are more alive and less cut-from-stock, maybe they use their settings in interesting ways. What catches your eye? And then, how can you use their tricks in your own unique ways? You’re not copying, you’re getting inspiration.
Do this too, as you read or watch movies or tv in future.
I hope this helps, and remember - there’s nothing wrong with the way you write now and you are already ahead of the curve for wanting to grow.
Thanks so much Erin, I appreciate you pointing a way forward! And also, thanks for the encouragement about my stories -- I have been feeling a bit down and uncertain about them, so I appreciate it. :)
I am an involved in Nina‘s stunning sentences workshops. Such beautiful writing is new to me and doesn’t come naturally. For the last two years, I’ve been frozen and stuck in writing and rewriting my first chapter, over and over again. Recently, I adopted Steinbeck‘s rules and I’m just pushing through the writing and I am up to 70 pages. I cannot write beautiful sentences like Nina has been teaching us when I am pushing to get words on the page. When would such artistic sentences usually be written? In the first draft? In the second draft? Thank you for your consideration.
Michael,
Thank you for joining my stunning sentence world! There is no one way to write a novel; there's probably 80,000 ways. It sounds like what you're doing right now is best: write and write without paying attention to the sentences to create a first draft. After this, the story will float around in your inner world and become more solid. Characters will begin (and maybe they already have begun) to feel real and alive and talking to you. There! That's a beginning to go back and work on sentences, especially if you're in first person or close third. You need the character's diction and syntactical choices--but before you can do that, you have to hear the character speaking.
Nina
Good Morning,
Dulcie here, thank you so much for opening this Q&A!!!!
This is a generalised question on getting from someone wishing to get a job in the writing industry. How would you go about it?
Thank you again
Dulcie
Hi Dulcie,
The writing industry is pretty broad. Can you be more specific? In publishing? Working at a journal? Newspaper? Magazine?
Nina
Thank you so much for getting back to me
I’d love to work at a publishing house, but I understand the demand is very much higher than the job openings.
Perhaps a smaller publication, or writer within a company business
Thank you
Dulcie
Dulcie,
Maybe start by looking at job listings in this area. For instance, Poets & Writers lists writing jobs: https://www.pw.org/joblistings.
Writers Work connects writers with companies: https://writers.work/qualify
There's also Upwork: https://www.upwork.com/
Freelancing Females: https://freelancingfemales.com/
Sometimes, you start as a freelancer and it can turn into something more permanent.
Nina
JO: Hello again, I’m Lea. Well, this is not really a question in itself. I just created a writing system since last year that I just have the names just the beginning of this year. The name is called the Writing Essence system (I don’t know if you ever heard of it before). So the system goes like this:
The Writing Essences
For Primary Essences:
- Theatrical
- Humorous
- Natural
- Classic
- Sentimental
- Romantic
- Ethereal
For Secondary Essences:
- Theatrical
- Humorous
- Natural
- Classic
- Sentimental
- Romantic
- Ethereal
For Tertiary Essences:
- Theatrical
- Humorous
- Natural
- Classic
- Sentimental
- Romantic
- Ethereal
For Undertones:
- Sharp
- Stable
- Soft
Format:
“[Author’s Name]’s Writing Essence is [Primary Essence]-[Secondary Essence]-[Tertiary Essence] with [Undertone] undertones.”
For example, my Writing Essence is Classic-Romantic-Sentimental with Stable undertones.
Disclaimer: Most writers will include all elements from the essences, but their Writing Essence is their three most prominent of the Essences and their most dominant Undertone out of all.
The Writing Essence system also focuses on how each Essence and the corresponding Undertone affect the mechanics below and also the other way around:
Theme
Characterization
Worldbuilding
Plot
Vocabulary
Syntax
Voice
However, Conventions (spelling, punctuation, and grammar) is the only aspect where it is mostly Essence and Undertone neutral. That said though, certain stylistic choices in Conventions can affect the Essence and Undertone.
For this system to work at its best, the writer has to write first and write a lot. Then the writer (or whoever else analysed their works (e.g., readers, beta readers, critics, editors, etc.) must sit back and look for the underlying patterns throughout one (if that is the only work) or several of their works (ideally across many works and genres). Once their Writing Essence has been identified, the writer can do the following:
Lean further into and refine their instincts (their natural Writing Essence).
Make subtle changes to their Writing Essence (mostly to their tertiary Essences and Undertones)
Challenge themselves by drastically changing your Writing Essence (either temporarily or long-term), However, they too need to be very intentional about the change.
For a writer’s writing to be strong and sound, their instinct (i. e., their Writing Essence), their intention (what they have in mind), and execution (i. e., the actual written work and the mechanics behind it) have to be in alignment. And that’s what distinguishes strong writing from weak writing.
That said, all Essences and Undertones can write in all genres and tropes. The difference lies in how one’s Writing Essence will affect the intention and execution. For example, typical romance comedies in popular market usually radiate Romantic, Humorous, Natural, or maybe Sentimental during its more introspective scenes. However, a writer with Ethereal (whether as a primary/secondary/tertiary) in their Writing Essence can write a romance comedy that is more dreamy, introspective, fantastical, and/or all the above. Meanwhile, a writer with Theatrical in their Writing Essence can write a romance comedy that is more punchy, dramatic, and play-like. As for Classic? Just think of Jane Austen, but can also be the modern version of her works.
By the way, this system does not only include the canon and literary authors, but can also include commercial authors, fanfiction writers, poets, screenwriters, playwrights, songwriters, mangakas, visual novel authors, webnovel authors, illustrators who are also authors, children book authors, creative nonfiction writers, journalists, essayists, memoirists, bloggers, critics, some academia writers, and anyone who writes creatively and expressively.
However, the system does not include technical writers (e.g., standard manual writers, etc.), functional writers (e.g., medical reports, police records, etc.), ghostwriters, AI-assisted writing, and artists who does not write for their creative pieces.
Colors Behind the Essences
Theatrical: Crimson Red
Humorous: Cadmium Yellow
Natural: Forest Green
Classic: Royal Blue
Romantic: Rose Pink
Sentimental: Apricot Orange
Ethereal: Periwinkle Purple
Undertones and Color Value
Sharp: Darkens the base color with black.
Stable: Keeps the base color as is.
Soft: Lightens the base color with white.
———
So what do you think of this system? If you have questions about it, I can further clarify them, and I may also would send a Google Doc more about the Writing Essence system.
Hi Lea! Wow, this is really interesting (and a super comprehensive breakdown). I love how you've associated colours with all the different essences for a visual element.
This bit is my favourite:
"For this system to work at its best, the writer has to write first and write a lot."
And then to analyse the patterns and decide whether to lean into, change or challenge their instincts. Sounds like a really thoughtful practice for any writer.
Thank you for sharing!
Thank you, I’m glad that you like it. So, if you would look to yourself, how would you describe your own Writing Essence? The three most dominant in your own writing plus the undertone?
Oh I think it changes massively between projects for me!
I mean it’s true, but what is the three Essences that you tend to go for, regardless of genre? For example, I would consider myself as a Classic-Romantic-Sentimental with Stable undertones despite having written poems, a horror fanfiction, a crack fic, and now a romantic dramedy.
The thing is that what kinds of themes, characters, worldbuilding, plots, vocabulary, syntaxes, and voices do you tend to gravitate to in spite of “massive changes between projects”. For example, with Theme, here is my explanation:
Themes (per Essence)
Theatrical: Good versus Evil, Justice, Revenge, Identity, Free Will, Grief, Human Perception, Mortality, Courage, Power, War,
Humorous: Coming-of-Age, Love (not only romantic), Family, Identity, Free Will, Friendship, Human Perception, Childhood, Courage, War,
Natural: Coming-of-Age, Revenge, Survival, Family, Perseverance, Free Will, Friendship, Mortality, Childhood, Peace, War, Innocence, Loneliness, etc.
Classic: Coming-of-Age, Love (not only romantic), Good versus Evil, Justice, Revenge, Survival, Faith, Family, Identity, Kindness, Perseverance, Free Will, Friendship, Grief, Human Perception, Mortality, Childhood, Courage, Peace, Power, Redemption, War, Innocence, Loneliness, etc.
Romantic: Coming-of-Age, Love (not only romantic), Faith, Family, Identity, Kindness, Perseverance, Free Will, Friendship, Grief, Human Perception, Childhood, Courage, Peace, Power, Redemption, War, Innocence, Loneliness, etc.
Sentimental: Coming-of-Age, Love (not only romantic), Faith, Family, Identity, Kindness, Perseverance, Friendship, Grief, Human Perception, Childhood, Peace, Redemption, Innocence, Loneliness, etc.
Ethereal: Good versus Evil, Faith, Free Will, Grief, Mortality, Peace, Redemption, Loneliness, etc.
Themes (per Undertone)
Sharp: Love (not only romantic), Good versus Evil, Justice, Revenge, Survival, Perseverance, Free Will, Grief, Human Perception, Mortality, Courage, Power, War,
Stable: Coming-of-Age, Love (not only romantic), Good versus Evil, Justice, Survival, Faith, Family, Identity, Kindness, Perseverance, Free Will, Friendship, Grief, Human Perception, Mortality, Childhood, Courage, Peace, Power, Redemption, War, Innocence, Loneliness, etc.
Soft: Coming-of-Age, Love (not only romantic), Faith, Family, Identity, Kindness, Perseverance, Friendship, Grief, Human Perception, Childhood, Peace, Redemption, Innocence, Loneliness, etc.
[I hope this helps. 😊]
I think my brain's a bit overwhelmed by all this categorisation to be honest! Something I'd have to think about for a while...
It’s alright, you can take your time. 😊 It can be overwhelming, especially from the writer themselves like you and me (I did not even know mine until reflecting a lot from writing events and have the language for the system). It’s often after you reflect from yourself and also what others said of your works that you can identify it.
Hi Lauren,
I am at the uni of Iowa and I'm studying and making comic/essay hybrids. I say hybrids only because sometimes I want it to just be writing other times I use lots of visuals. That said, I often draft my work as traditional screenplays and I had a few questions for you based on that.
1. What are some films that have great/interesting/poetic/unique narration that you recommend studying? Comics are full of them, so if you think of something experimental that would also be great to just see.
2. How do you go about the interplay between action lines and dialogue? And how do you revise and sharpen them after you got your draft all locked in?
3. I have started writing my action lines in a poetic register or style, I was curious if you had anyone that you can think of that writes action lines like this, or just anyone you really love that we should check out for great action lines?
Thank you.
Hi Nikka! Thanks so much for your question! First of all, what you're writing sounds f-ing RAD! ...
I'll go in order:
1). Hmm, I think these are my favorite examples of unique/playful narration (and all skew comedy if aren't outright comedy): "Adaptation," "Clueless," "Fleishman's in Trouble," "Arrested Development," "The Princess Bride," "Ferris Bueller's Day Off," "The Big Short." Each of these is doing something unique with authorship (i.e., who is the "god" of this world?) and VOICE. So that the narration ("V.O."/voice-over in script terms) brings its own fun energy (vs: just a rote "and then this happened next" play by play). In "The Princess Bride," for example, the fairy tale we're watching unfold is "narrated" by a grandfather reading a bedtime story to his grandson—the grandfather is thus the weaver of the entire world, and the dynamic between the characters and the narration is its own start-&-stop, self-referential gag throughout the whole film. I'm not a huge fan of the show, but "Sex and the City" for sure conjured some iconic voice-over! In "Adaptation," Charlie Kaufman is to some degree always playing with whether he's writing a "good" or "bad" screenplay, and in fact has a scene where screenwriting guru Robert McKee yells: "And God help you if you use voice-over in your work, my friends. God help you! That’s flaccid, sloppy writing. Any idiot can write a voice-over narration to explain the thoughts of a character" ... in a film where Kaufman IS using voice-over! So there's a lot of PLAY in these examples.
And on that point (per McKee), I should say that the "common wisdom" in screenwriting is that V.O. is a liability and should be avoided whenever possible. BUT, although bad V.O. is an absolute dream-killer, as you see above it CAN be done very, very well. You just want to use it sparingly and make sure it's ADDING to the story, never pulling people out. Let me know if you have more Qs about that "rule"!
2). Action lines & dialogue: The general rule is you want your action lines to be *super duper tight* & economical—only what absolutely needs to be described & set-up for reader in order for the characters to take over the scene and run with it. Ideally, only one paragraph or a few lines to get us into the dialogue. Once you've established that we're in a spaceship and, say, panicked because an alarm is going off, you get OUT of that set-up and let the characters take over with dialogue & action. But let me know if I misunderstood your Q!
3). So, "industry standard" is that action lines should be written VERY straightforwardly for clarity & pith ("lean & mean"). Some screenwriters are slightly more colorful with their lines, but it can be never be verbose. You would have a very hard time getting a script made that didn't adhere to industry standard guidelines. The reason is actually a good one: Scripts are first & foremost a BLUEPRINT. They're instructions with which the director, crew, and actors build sets and light correctly and act correctly and execute your writerly vision. Action lines are meant to simply be an "information conveyance" system. You also don't want to spend too much time in them because it SLOWS DOWN the "action" (your plot) for your reader—your reader isn't getting the free flowing story experience they would when WATCHING. And you want the reading to replicate the WATCHING of the eventual filmed story as much as possible. That's how you get someone to fall in love with & make your script—you give them the VISUAL experience on the page that they'd get seeing it on the screen.
That said, the way I teach in my classes is that it is absolutely OKAY to bring some voice to your action lines. Especially if it's tone/mood/rhythm setting. And you'll see a lot of great writers do this here & there: Greta Gerwig, P.T. Anderson, Kenneth Lonergan (though he comes from playwriting), Kaufman. So you shouldn't be afraid to bring your own "voice," and flair to your action lines. But it can never be DISTRACTING. You never want to be sacrificing clarity & speed for your voice. So you really can't do it in meter. Remember the action lines are an information delivery system, not their own "thing." This was VERY HARD for me when I began writing scripts, because I came to it as a poet! So I get the urge to make the action lines into something more. It's simply not what a script is, though.
BUT! I would definitely encourage you to find ways to *fold that meter* into the story itself! Remember, the action lines in a script don't wind up on screen. No words wind up on screen. So no one will hear or see this beauty you're conjuring. And only what can be SEEN OR HEARD when filmed ever makes it to the audience. Your metered writing sounds so fun & creative—you need to get that into the meat of the scene! So we the audience can experience it.
Let me know if I can clarify anything or if you have any other questions! <3
Wow so cool. These answers are all wonderful. I will dig into the folks I've not heard or thought of. I do love Kaufman and hadn't made that connection of the VO in Adaptation so that's brilliant. I also took McKee's seminar and he was marvelous and basically exactly like he was in the movie lol.
I totally hear what you're saying on the action lines and VO, in comics, which again is where I'm sort of working and borrowing from film since it's just way more developed now, you almost can't get away without using VO/Narration. Some comics are wordless but because you can't have someone act or play a musical score you almost have to add another vehicle for meaning, which becomes the VO. I just feel like if a film or show can pull it off, then it really must be incredible. Anyways your answers around that were all perfect. If anything else comes up from this response, I'd love to hear it.
As far as action lines that makes total sense. For me I'm also the one drawing it and I guess when I think of great art versus great illustration, the difference for me usually means that the artists discovered something in the making of the finished object that they couldn't have worked out in small scale, had people sign off on and then just transcribed to a large scale (which is often the process for illustration). I'm being super broad here so I'm sure there are exceptions, but it seems impossible to imagine Jackson Pollock making a small scale drawing of his painting and then making the room sized painting while following the blueprint he'd laid out. But that is exactly what Normal Rockwell would usually do (as I understand it). So for me I guess I've gravitated towards writing poetic action lines as a way to allow me to come back to the scene and not fully know what's there and kinda find it on the page, which is exciting. That said, I did find the screenplay for Slumdog Millionaire to be kinda poetic in how minimal it was. I'll throw up a little bit below to maybe better explain my thinking and what I'm looking to find more of but if any of this sparks any suggestions or further ideas, I'd be so grateful to hear it but no expectation. Your insights above were great and already so helpful.
INT. JAVED'S SAFE-HOUSE. BATHROOM. NIGHT.
An expensive bathroom suite . Excess of marble and gold taps. Into the bath, a hand is scattering rupee notes. Hundreds and hundreds of notes, worth hundreds of thousands of rupees. The sound of a fist thumping on the bathroom door, furious shouting from the other side.
JAVED O/S
Salim! Salim!
INT. STUDIO. BACKSTAGE. DAY.
Darkness. Then, glimpses of faces. In the half-light, shadowy figures move with purpose. An implacable voice announces.
Hi Nikka! I'm so glad some of these thoughts were helpful!!
"Slumdog Millionaire" is a great example of how to be both very pithy & economical AND exciting and artful in that minimalism. I do not (to be clear) think everyone's action lines should sound identical—far from it. What you want is to find YOUR version of sparse, packed-with-visual-meaning, clean & clear—in YOUR voice. But, yeah, meter would not only be unbearably distracting for the reader (no matter how brilliant or beautiful) it would distort the clear information you're trying to convey.
I don't think you should hesitate at all to use V.O.! You sound creative & original through-&-through, so I'm sure you can find an original twist (like some of these other films we've referenced) for your V.O., that really sells it! I would maybe consider doing THAT in meter?? Instead? Could be really cool.
Not sure I answered all your follow-up questions, please let me know if I didn't!
And happy writing! This project sounds rad.
Shelby-
Hello! I'm an aspect writer with my own blog, and I was wondering how you would suggest trying to reach a wider audience of people. As of now it is just my close friends and family that read it and I'd like to market it out further. It's through wordpress. Thanks!
Hey Addie (:
Would you link your blog for me?
Of course!
It's https://lifeshoneyy.wordpress.com
Wonderful, thank you (:
Your blog (and yourself) have a warm and optimistic vibe. The world is pretty intense right now so I would lean into feel good content as it could give people a sense of comfort and provide a temporary escape.
My advice:
Find a social media platform that you don't hate and focus on creating content that gives tons of value to folks. If you like making video content, I would focus on tik tok and cross post to instagram.
If you prefer written content, I would focus on bluesky and cross post to threads & X.
Whichever platform you decide, I would start with sharing the following types of content:
- Quotes | Inspirational, relateable or funny
- Advice | Actionable, specific, quick and unique
You mentioned friends and family reading your blog, I would ask them to share the highly valuable social media content you create. Its super easy and fast to retweet/share to stories etc and it will get you in front of fresh eyes.
Another thing that you can do is write things about your town and share them in local facebook groups.
Things like short stories about places people know about, roundups of things to do close by, and do it in the same feel good style as your blog. On your personal facebook page, pin a post directing people to your blog.
Folks will click on your profile out of curiosity when they see your posts in the groups and head to your blog to see more stuff beacuase naturally humans are nosey (;
Good luck!
I've never heard of bluesky, will definitely look into that as well as everything else you mentioned. Thank you so much for the advice!
its exploding in popularity with writers right now! and of course <3
SHELBY, I'm self-publishing my first collection of poetry. Should I be writing my own synopsis [for the back of the book] to describe the collection? Should I hire someone who has a more objective lens? (If so, how?) Any tips appreciated.
Hello Allison, and congratulations on your collection!
There isn't a "right" answer for this, and it depends on many factors but I can tell you that the synopsis and the cover of your book are the two of the biggest components of getting someone to opt in to reading your work and are extremely important.
If you do decide to hire someone, I would choose a copywriter with marketing expertise particularly in the area/themes that your collection covers. Reedsy can be a great resource for finding someone, and so can word of mouth.
Reguardless of your choice, I highly reccomend perusing shelves at a local bookstore/library and pulling collections with synopsis(es?) Synopsi? 👀 that grab your attention and using these as inspiration. If choosing to write yourself, pinpoint what it is that grabbed you and if going with a pro, present them as inspiration so they understand your vision.
Whoa this is really helpful. Thank you, Shelby! I didn't know of Reedsy!
Writing a synopsis! I am having to do this for the first time... and I am having trouble keeping it short whilst including all key plot points, main characters, lead up to climax, climax itself and the resolution. Plus I am suppoed to howcase my writing style in it! How important is length? what really matters most in a synopsis? Thanks
Ayyyy synopses. I feel your pain. And will try to answer your questions!
- How important is length? Well, depends what you're using it for. Most agents/submission guides will tell you what they want, eg: 1 page, 500 words, 3 pages, whatever. But as a general rule I think it's good practice to learn how to summarise your story in a single page (arg, I know).
- How to keep it short while including all the key plot points etc? Unfortunately you're never gonna manage to include everything you want to, especially if you have complicated subplots and an ensemble cast. My go-to approach is to focus on your protagonist's arc. All the vital stuff is happening to them, and it's their personal journey that's ultimately the most engaging. Think about cause/effect here, too. Something happens and your character responds/acts. You can ping pong your way through the whole synop that way. This also helps me keep on track and refrain from including extraneous details, because ALL the focus is on the main character and their journey through the story.
- How to showcase your writing style? I actually think this ties into the last point — when you're focusing on your character, you can add in a sense of *their* voice and POV by showing how they're emotionally/physically reacting as the story unfolds. But a synopsis isn't really the main place to be demonstrating your narrative voice anyway — keep that to your sample pages and hint at it more overtly in your query. Your synopsis is ostensibly a map for a reader/agent to make sure your story hits all the right narrative landmarks, so clarity is more important than anything.
Oh Jo, thank you for this simple list of pointers! You basically nailed my worries like a mind-reader. Alright, here goes...again!
Best to you always, j
Good luck!!
SHELBY: Knowing that having an active & engaged social media presence (as a poet/spoken word performer who performs regularly, is quering their first book pub., and is looking to launch a merch. line), but also knowing that doing so properly takes up a lot of time & expertise, both of which I'm lacking, how would you suggest I best proceed?
(Notes: I have a friend who's an avid IG & TikTok user & who's offered to help me. I use fb & IG, but I'm usure of going to three (TikTok). Should I limit it, and to which ones?)
Hey Roméo(:
Can you link both profiles here and I will take a look and tell you my thoughts
GENERAL QUESTION: my character is in his neighborhood, a bustling one. He knows everyone’s name, every shop, but none of these people is a character in the story. It’s near the beginning of the story and I don’t want to throw out 3-5 more names to readers that aren’t relevant to the story, but I also don’t want to give a generic description of a busy street as if he’s there for the first time. How do you handle this? How do you balance specificity without overwhelming readers?
If this is a first draft, I would let yourself go wild and describe it all, because I think you will find the perfect specific descriptions within when you go back to rewrite or revise. I would love for someone else to step in and give their perspective too, but something that came up for me was, what about describing things that a) would grab your character’s senses, and b)speak to the authority of your character.
So if I have a character who is a musician, she is going to use a lot of descriptors that relate to music. Instead of nails on a chalkboard, maybe something sounds like a record scratch, or an untuned instrument, or pitchy. (Just an on the fly example!) If I have a character who is interested in technology, she may be constantly relating to the technology around her, thinking about possible advancements or the problems it solves or prevents.
So think about your character’s relevant passions/career/things that make him, him. How does he relate to the world based off of that?
For the senses, instead of Joe’s Bakery, you can say, “I walked past the bakery every morning and although I rarely stepped inside, the smell of their croissants followed me the rest of the day. I was convinced the smell wafting through the street stuck itself to my shirt, and everyone around me could smell it, too. Next to the bakery, the door to the music store was constantly open, and the owner blared Billy Joel through the speakers. I didn’t love having Piano Man stuck in my head all day.”
That was terrible LOL but hopefully you see what I mean!
When you edit, you can take out the information that seems superfluous, or as you go on with the story you may decide to change the beginning anyway!
Oh, those are very good suggestions. Thank you, Erin. My character is a homeless street performer. He sings and dances and plays instruments. Besides music (sounds), what else do you think he would pay attention to?
I have another problem: the scene mentioned above is he’s walking down the street with the antagonist. He’s in quite a lot of trouble. So his mind is relatively occupied, so I don’t know how to describe this bustling scene because it’s probably just background noise to him at this point. How would you deal with it?
This sounds like a really interesting story!! This sends my mind off into a few different directions. Firstly, has your character always been homeless, or do they have a past you can draw upon for what he will notice? Perhaps he would compare how people treat him now to how people treated him in the past. He would be hyperaware of anyone who treats him especially kindly now. Perhaps there is someone in the neighborhood you're describing who gives him a free coffee or breakfast every day, but today he isn't able to stop and talk to them and accept the coffee because he is with the Villain of the novel. Does he look around trying to find someone who will help him, while the antagonist is talking to him (if he knows this person is the antagonist at the moment), and if you choose to use some of my previous advice you could always twist the tense, "Normally I noticed [something], but Theo's incessant talking was drowning it all out." "I didn't realize how much I loved the sounds of my town, the birds calling out to each other, the music pouring out of the flower shop, even the horns of the cars of impatient businessmen, until they were drowned out by Rufus' off-pitch drawl, like whoever tuned his voice did it wrong."
Thank you so much. You gave me quite a few ideas to play with.
ERIN: How would you suggest I best follow and speak on (i.e., explain) my creative process as an IndigiQueer poet, writing about my intersectionalities, fed by the spirits of my ancestors (whose voices were suppressed, hidden, & lost), in a world that may not fully understand (or, in some cases, even respect/accept) any or all of these aspects/dynamics?
Hi Roméo, I love this question so much and thank you for trusting me with it. Based off of my own experience as a queer writer,
Decide where you have hard boundaries around your own process (like, you are writing a poem for yourself, or for a writing group, or for publication) and where you might be flexible (an example is paid work where you are working closely with an editor if you choose to be flexible without compromising your entire self)
Decide what you are willing to “teach” others, and where you are willing to simply state, “I appreciate your input, but I am making a choice to keep this piece the way it is as it reflects my intention…” and so forth. IF this book speaks to you, I might recommend glancing through Craft in the Real World by Matthew Salesses or some of Alexander Chee’s work, and recommending what you find most helpful to those who have questions. For example, Salesses speaks to how the structure of writing in the (Straight) White Western World is very different from how story structure is in other cultures and groups.
Stay true to your writing process no matter how hard others are working to get you to follow theirs - sometimes the hardest part of having boundaries is actually holding them and not crumbling.
I have a take what you need and leave the rest philosophy - allow your writing process to evolve as you yourself learn more information!
Find people you jive with to read your writing. We absolutely need to get used to criticism from individuals who do not see our work the same way as we do, or do not agree with it in some way. However, it’s important that you’re not constantly fighting for your work. Your work is meant to be loved.
To give an example, I write from a queer female perspective. I had a historical novel I was working on in which most of the characters were queer. I had a well-meaning person in my critique group argue with me about it, because he felt they weren’t getting enough push back for being queer in the context of the novel. But he wasn’t understanding that was the point, the problems most of the characters faced were outside of their queerness, and I was writing with the intention of queer joy. But does that mean none of his criticism was correct? Not necessarily. Perhaps there were ways I could have made my intention more clear within the work. So at the end of the day it involves us also putting a lot of ego aside, and turning over the criticism in our minds to find what was useful even if in the moment it didn’t feel like it was.
I sincerely hope this was all helpful and please feel free to ask me clarifying questions! Have a wonderful day, Roméo!
JO: Is there an ideal blend/balance of anecdote and narrative text, or does it depend entirely on the individual project? I'm at work on a 1,200-word essay with a LOT of anecdotes (mostly about household animals and death). There's just enough connective tissue to connect the anecdotes thematically, but something in me worries that readers will react with, "Oh, hell, ANOTHER story? About a totally different animal?" (If this question is too specific to my one project, feel free to toss it.)
Hi John! I think the connective tissue and the overall thematic arc/narrative journey of the piece is more important than hitting any arbitrary balance between the two. When you say "just enough connective tissue" that makes me think that perhaps it could be stronger? Do you know what you're trying to say with this essay? Does it have a clear opening premise/question? Does it have a shape? Does it build to some sort of resolution or exploration of that initial premise/question? Can the reader clearly see how you're jumping from anecdote to anecdote and layering up your ideas/meanings along the way? If not, there's a risk it ends up as just a collection of cool stories strung together... Although it sounds like your idea goes a lot deeper than that!
My suggestion would be to get the first draft out, then look more closely at the connectivity and shape of the whole thing. Then get some fresh eyes to give you objective feedback.
There's also probably (definitely) a whole lot more useful advice than mine to be found in this workshop: https://www.theforeverworkshop.com/s/finding-your-essays-heartbeat
Hi, Jo...I would have responded sooner, but damn, your questions (and the heartbeat workshop) drove me right back into the essay, and I've been preoccupied since then. Right now I think a couple of sentences might be all that's needed. However it turns out, though, your input was invaluable. Thank you!
That's so good to hear! Really pleased you've been immersed in your essay. I hope you find a home for it — pls let me know if you do!